'It really depends on the situation, but generally it's my instinct to ask what's wrong and if there's anything I can do.
Yes, and it's nothing to do with being stunningly beautiful or intellectually brilliant (I'm neither). It's that I can be intense. I look for and expect emotional intimacy too quickly and too...
My point is we are interpreting the word negatively. It is reductionist to see calculating as also cold (or manipulative). I don't think it at all implies a a lack of respectful boundaries. Why do...
You can be calculating without being manipulative (or cold). Ex: you have a long-term goal, such as getting into a competitive graduate program. For years you work at to getting good grades, you...
Calculating, but not cold. I go out of my way to not be hurtful or otherwise mistreat people.
I presume you don't see it more than twice though.
I have Major Depression, and have for 20+ years. Some periods of my life have been better than others, sometimes almost normal. All details aside, I've tried to look at what about my life is making...
I read somewhere that INFJs are exceptionally good at neglecting their own intuition and Fe, which is weird because we are quite in touch with it. It's almost a self-inflicted injury considering how...
I'm not sure what you mean. I think questions posed to mean something else (known only to the person posing the questions) are at the very least not straight forward, and arguably also manipulative...
All the time. Weird forgetfulness about details combined with weirdly good memory for other details. Often give people the impression I am not paying attention which frustrates them. Social idiot....
I like pizza loaded with veggies, extra everything. I like a nice dry white wine with grilled shrimp. *Note: what I like and what I actually eat are two different things!
Everything happens for a reason. Yeah, like someone made a stupid decision?!
Probably more subtle and dangerous. They might be more likely to be in the helping professions, and be taking advantage of people as their therapist or doctor.
It's all good. No, it is not all good!
I find (and have heard from others) that green tea can be way more stimulating and anxiety provoking than coffee actually. I avoid the stuff for sure!
Can't speak for other INFJs, but I find it exacerbates my anxiety problem.
Most INFJs I know, myself included, have a spiritual streak that at least puts them squarely into the agnostic category.
I am guessing that if you ever have the misfortune of a real life tragic injury or illness to a loved one, you will stop these fantasies.
Not bad at pleasuring my partner, bad at letting go and letting myself be pleasured.
You're not going insane at all. I have two graduate degrees, acquired at considerable cost and huge effort. But at 38 I've decided I want a totally new career. I plan on returning to school this...
I always think I'll enjoy it more than I actually do.
I love to express myself, but I think and type quickly. Ergo many typos! I usually edit longer posts multiple times, even if no one is reading them. Typos and other types of errors personally...
Not in my case! Thin, yes, but muscular no. I get so bored lifting weights or doing crunches etc. When I walk, jog, use the Stairmaster etc, I can zone out into my own world, watch movies, listen to...
Relatively speaking, I believe myself to be an above average writer. I must say that I see unusually thoughtful, concise and eloquently expressed posts on INFJ forums. So, based on wholly anecdotal...
Tentatively hopeful middle-aged woman shyly blossoming. (I'm counting middle-aged as one word)
I am sorry, I haven't read every reply to this excellent thread yet, but I wanted to relate my experience and opinion. I am currently a housewife/stay at home wife. I am a support system for my...
Interesting. I used to like boxing, and will still watch boxing movies and documentaries. This from someone who otherewise claims to and really does generally abhor blood sport.
Listening to others and making them feel heard. We are excellent therapists!
I took it for a time and found it remarkably similar to Prozac. Both caused me to feel/act slightly manic, which does sometimes seem like an improvement to my depression, but I stopped taking it...
Can't stand relationships with Es! They always fail because my idea of a good time is stay in and have one on one time, or go somewhere quiet and peaceful and have one on one time. Es idea of a good...
This used to happen to me. Then my social anxiety got much worse and I started to feel no qualms about saying no to things I didn't want to do and/or feel obligated to do. Saying no is a way of...
My spouse, who is likely an INTJ.
Yes, I felt this way. I went from being stressed out to saddened by the dynamics of our relationship.
So true. I struggled with what the answer was to the post, but when I read your reply I mentally went This!
Ask your boss if you can drop the leftovers at a homeless shelter?
Yes, absolutely. I was raised in a household where even physical illness was considered a sign of some kind moral or spiritual weakness. Mental health problems/emotional distress were considered a...
6 au naturel, but I know how to work what I have, which can bring me up to 7ish.
I find no contact to be the only solution. In other words, totally cut off the person who has violated my trust.
Perfectionist shopping. I have an idealized vision of something in my head, and inevitably the item I purchase somehow fails. I end up with a lot of dupes.
38, 2 graduate degrees and ready to start all over again studying something completely new. I found that as a people pleaser during my younger years, I picked up the somewhat narcissistic trait of...
Yes, absolutely. Because I am very intuitive I am always taking in a lot. Sometimes it's difficult to prioritize the focus and significance of the information I am always taking in, I can end up...
I am generally a people pleaser when called out of my shell. However, once someone has crossed the line with me, it's pretty much over and I am damn cold.
Good question. I've found I am attracted to more melancholy type films and literature. I've often reflected on why. I think it's partly an appreciation of quality. Let's face it, comedy is one of the...
Not exactly a ghost story, but supernatural of sorts. When I was an adult and living away from my childhood home, I had a vivid dream that a cat that I had picked as kitten that lived with my...
Confrontation sometimes makes my heart pound and causes me to physically shake. I am an empath, so seeing/hearing about something very sad, reading about animal cruelty etc, can make tears come to...
So, when I was a Sophomore in college I lived alone in a small ground floor apartment in a somewhat crappy neighborhood that also had its charm. It was far off campus, but since I wanted my own...
Large nose, in general interesting face, not obese, smells good. I like full, gray hair. I don't care for piercings. Facial hair is a turn-off for me because it reminds me off my dad, whom I love,...
It corrected some of the inner feeling of insecurity. I felt insecure because I had a disproportionately large and crooked nose, which garnered unwanted attention, thus making me feel bad. When the...
I got 70% I am quite empathic to an extent, but once someone makes it impossible for me to identify with them on a human level (ex: acts extremely abusive), I lose the ability to empathize with...
1. Are you concerned about your physical appearance? Yes, I exercise in order to stay very slim, not for health reasons. Same with not over-eating. I keep my hair nicely done, wear makeup daily,...'
